The role of Root-Cause therapy in rewriting your personal narrative

What if the story you’ve been telling yourself isn’t the whole truth?

We all have a story about who we are. Sometimes, it’s empowering—other times, it’s a script we didn’t write but somehow accepted as truth.

Maybe your inner narrative sounds like this:
💭 “I’m not good enough.”
💭 “I always mess things up.”
💭 “People will leave if I show them the real me.”

Or perhaps it’s something more specific:
💭 “Success is for other people, not for me.”
💭 “I have to put others first, otherwise I’m selfish.”
💭 “I don’t deserve to be happy.”

These beliefs don’t come out of nowhere. They’re shaped by childhood experiences, relationships, cultural messages, and past pain. And over time, they become the stories we live by—even if they no longer serve us.

But here’s the truth:
👉 Your narrative is not set in stone. You can rewrite it.
👉 Therapy helps you break free from the old script and create a new, empowering story.

Let’s talk about how.

How do limiting beliefs form?

A limiting belief is a deeply held thought or assumption that shapes how we see ourselves, others, and the world around us. These beliefs usually form in childhood and are influenced by:

✔️ Family messages – What we were told (explicitly or implicitly) about our worth, capabilities, or role in relationships.
✔️ Cultural and societal norms – Expectations around success, gender roles, emotional expression, and achievement.
✔️ Emotional experiences – Moments where we felt rejected, abandoned, ashamed, or unsafe.
✔️ Significant relationships – Caregivers, teachers, or early friendships shape how we see ourselves.

The childhood link: why do these beliefs start so young?

In early childhood, our brains are still developing, particularly the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for logical reasoning and self-reflection. This means that as children, we absorb experiences without critically evaluating them. Instead of thinking, "Mum was emotionally unavailable because she was struggling with her own issues," a child might internalise the message, "I'm not important enough to be loved."

Studies in attachment theory and developmental psychology show that early experiences of rejection, neglect, or conditional love create core beliefs that follow us into adulthood (Bowlby, 1988).

For example:
💬 If a child is constantly criticised for mistakes, they may develop the belief “I must be perfect, or I’ll be unworthy.”
💬 If a child’s emotions were ignored or dismissed, they may believe “My feelings don’t matter.”
💬 If love or approval was only given when they achieved something, they may learn “My worth depends on what I accomplish.”

These beliefs become automatic patterns of thinking, shaping our decisions, relationships, and self-image—often without us realising it.

How therapy helps you reframe and rewrite your narrative

1. Identifying the origins of your story

Therapy provides a safe space to explore where these limiting beliefs started. Once you understand where these stories came from, you gain the power to decide whether they still belong in your life.

👉 Example:
A client struggling with the belief “I have to earn love by being perfect” may trace it back to childhood experiences where they were only praised when achieving something. This helps them see that the belief was learned, not a fact—and therefore, it can be unlearned.

2. Challenging limiting beliefs

Not all thoughts are facts. But when a belief has been repeated enough—by parents, teachers, society, or even your own inner critic—it can feel like the absolute truth.

Therapy helps you step back and examine these beliefs critically:

✅ Is this belief based on evidence, or is it an assumption?
✅ Would I say this to a friend I love?
✅ What happens when I challenge this thought—does my world fall apart, or does it open up?

👉 Example:
Let’s say you believe “I don’t deserve happiness.” A therapist might help you ask:

• “Who taught you this?”

• “What evidence do you have for and against this belief?”

• “What would a more compassionate version of this story look like?”

Maybe your new story becomes:
✨ “I am worthy of happiness and joy, just as I am.”

How do we unlock limiting beliefs in therapy?

The process of rewriting limiting beliefs involves:

1️⃣ Identifying limiting beliefs through the sway test

Before we explore where a belief comes from, we first identify and confirm what limiting beliefs are present. Often, we’re aware of some of them (“I’m not good enough” or “I can’t trust people”), but others are deeply ingrained in the subconscious, shaping our behaviours without us realising.

One way we can tap into these hidden beliefs is through muscle sway testing (the sway test). This technique is based on kinesiology and helps access subconscious beliefs stored in the body. This test helps us identify which beliefs your nervous system and subconscious mind are holding onto. Once we identify the limiting beliefs at play, we can then trace them back to their origins.

2️⃣ Exploring the root cause

Now that we know which limiting beliefs are present, we go deeper to understand where they originated. Often, these beliefs were formed in early childhood as a way to make sense of our experiences and are hidden deep in the subconscious because it wasn’t processed fully at the time.

👉 Example: A client who holds the belief “I always have to prove myself to be valued” may uncover that it started in childhood, when they only received praise and attention from their parents for academic achievements, rather than for simply being themselves.

3️⃣ Reconnecting with emotions

In many cases, emotions weren’t fully expressed when the belief was first formed—either because:
a) it wasn’t safe to do so (e.g. a child couldn’t express anger towards a parent), or
b) they didn’t yet have the emotional skills to process it.

Therapy creates a space where these emotions can be revisited and processed in a safe, supportive way. This is crucial because emotions that weren’t processed when the belief formed remain stored in the body and mind, continuing to shape our actions and feelings.

4️⃣ Releasing the power the belief had over you

Once we process the emotional charge attached to a limiting belief, it no longer has the same hold over us. But what does this actually mean?

Think of a belief like “I’m not good enough.” If this belief was formed in childhood due to repeated criticism or lack of emotional validation, it doesn’t just stay as a passing thought—it becomes part of how we see ourselves, influencing our relationships, career choices, emotional responses, and even body language.

For example, someone holding onto “I’m not good enough” might:
🔹 Struggle with self-doubt and perfectionism.
🔹 Avoid taking risks, fearing failure.
🔹 Stay in unhealthy relationships, believing they don’t deserve better.
🔹 Feel disconnected from their true desires and potential.

Even though the original situation that created the belief is in the past, the belief itself continues to dictate life choices in the present. This is why simply saying "I want to think differently" is often not enough—we need to release the emotional charge stored in the subconscious mind and body.

5️⃣ Integrating a new, empowering narrative

Beyond letting go of the old belief, we work on shaping a new, authentic narrative that supports growth, self-worth, and emotional freedom. This includes:

✔️ Understanding how the old belief shaped your past behaviours and choices.
✔️ Accepting past versions of yourself with compassion.
✔️ Defining what your future self looks like—how they think, act, and show up in the world.
✔️ Implementing wellbeing strategies to support long-term change.

Integrative approach: making sense of the past and shaping the future

Beyond unlocking limiting beliefs, therapy also helps clients:

✔️ Understand how these beliefs shaped their choices – We explore patterns in relationships, career decisions, self-esteem, and emotional triggers.
✔️ Accept the past self with compassion – Recognising that the version of you who held onto this belief did the best they could with the knowledge they had at the time.
✔️ Define their future self – What does life look like without this belief? How does this person behave, work, love, and make decisions?
✔️ Implement present-day changes – We create a wellbeing framework that supports long-term growth and fulfilment.

Want to explore this topic further?

Here are some great books, podcasts, and research articles to help you reflect on your personal narrative:

Podcast episodes:

"Rewriting your story: A new way to see yourself" – The SelfWork Podcast with Dr Margaret Rutherford

"The stories we tell ourselves" – Unlocking Us with Brené Brown

Books:
"The body keeps the score" – Bessel van der Kolk (How past trauma shapes our beliefs)
"Radical acceptance" – Tara Brach (Releasing self-judgement)

Ready to rewrite your story? Let’s do it together.

If you're tired of the old narrative that keeps you feeling stuck, I’m here to help.

📅 Book your free 15-minute consultation here.

Your story isn’t over. You get to decide what happens next.